Fried Eggplant and Bundled Newspapers

Finishing the 4th Quarter Well

2011-04-05T11:02:00.000-07:00

I recently sent a letter to my boss saying something along the lines of "well, I'm of kind of feeling that it's the end of the third quarter, I've run up the score pretty well and it might be time for me to move to the sidelines and allow another person to quarter-back the team - when you need the big '3rd and long' look over and put me in." (Sort of a cute way of saying the big "R" word - Donchaknow!) You need to know that I don't believe that retirement (the big "R" word) is biblical. After all, wasn't Caleb out capturing turf after running off the opposition when he was in his 80s?? Didn't Abraham concieve in his 90's?? (I suppose I might want to clarify that I'm not thinking that!!!) I looked at my recent (???) history and wasn't totally surprised to note that if you add up 4 years in the Coast Guard, 31 years with IBM, and 15 years at Cedarville, that's 1/2 of a century of "pedal to the metal, high energy, take no prisoners activity." God has truly blessed my wife Sheron and I with three great children and 5 wonderful grand-children (to date) and has allowed us to enjoy at blessed sojourn here in Cedarville. Surely the un-named chief servant of Abraham had it right when he prayed "O Lord, (my God) give me success today and show kindness to my master Abraham (my wife and I.) See I am "hanging out at the well" and multitudes of possibilities will pass by. May it be that I'll say (as he did) "let down your jar that I may drink" (and review the many options) and have the ones that best fit your plan for the 4th quarter be apparent. Then perhaps I can also bow down and say "Praise be to the Lord of my master Abraham, (my God)who has not abandoned his kindness and faithfulness and has led and blessed me on this journey."

Development of Character - Briefly Explored

2007-10-08T11:22:00.000-07:00

What is character? More importantly, what is good character? The Greek philosopher Aristotle said it is “right conduct in relation to other persons and in relation to oneself.”

He also suggested “we are what we repeatedly do.” Obviously we want our children – the young adults of the next generation – to display good character. It would be helpful to review how to develop appropriate traits in the lives of those for whom we have educational or mentoring responsibility.

Good character is the public and private reflection of traits, attitudes and creeds that have become the convictions of the heart and are consistently demonstrated in wise personal choices of actions when confronted with opportunities, trials, or adversities. It is one thing to generate mind thoughts about appropriate goodness. It is something else to want to do good. The task at hand involves converting thoughts and desires into actually doing good. In Hamlet’s words, “Ah, there’s the rub.”

According to Kenneth Blackwell, the former secretary of state of Ohio, “Sadly, defined ethics (character traits) are not common anymore.” Recent surveys indicate that those who enter the professional world without a well-integrated sense of good character tend to fail – with “lack of integrity, honesty, theft, and sexual harassment” being the predominant reasons for dismissal, beyond downsizing. In response, Blackwell endorsed “The Uncommon Sense Declaration,” a citizen education project that advocates 20 character-based ethics, which he hoped would become the foundation of Ohio’s future professional and cultural interactions.

It is abundantly clear to me, as a university director of career services, interacting with various publics, that who we really are, as opposed to what we’ve studied or who we know, is of paramount importance.

The optimum location for the development of the “who we are” nature of character is in the living room. Family taught disciplines, development of virtues, and dialogue on reasons, in addition to rules, could be the best developmental laboratory for the growth and practice of good character traits. The next best setting is the classroom, where teachers must model and mold strong character though example and dialogue. Then there is the collegiate event room, where “leadership and character” training take place. Finally, there is the boardroom, the corporate level where character is assumed. Our ability to have meaningful impact diminishes with each level.

The focus of this piece is the second room, the classroom. Character education cannot exist by simply offering a helpful list of virtues such as honesty, kindness, duty, and citizenship. Such approaches attempt to promote external behavior without addressing who we really are; our character, our morals, our virtues. Christian schools may be the only place that can offer a comprehensive definition of these virtues. Jesus Christ is the consummate example of good character and taught that “we would know a tree by its fruit.” Such “Christ-schools” should be the laboratory in which we mix all biblical truth, knowledge of right & wrong, and “in & out of class” curricula that give opportunities for repetition of good actions in the mixing pot of character development.

For character development to succeed in our classrooms, we must be willing to pay the price of defining evil to understand good. We must understand that guilt or shame may sometimes result from a desire for morality.

We must be willing to occasionally offend if we are to proclaim virtues. We must, as William Wilberforce did centuries ago, insist on manners and decency as a way of life. While known for his work to change Great Britain’s posture on slavery, he also managed to change their approach to civility, much of which is still a part of their 21st century culture.

We must inculcate a renewed desire to define, refine, articulate, and employ creeds that may bind, may limit, and may constrain our interactions with others. We must have a conviction that never wavers when faced with the adverse reactions that can result from those who don’t share our views. Thinking about good (head)is only the first step. Desiring to do good (heart) and then doing good (hands) are the absolute necessary outcomes of any of our attempts to teach character.

“To him that knoweth to do good, and doeth it not, to him it is sin.”

A Woman Of Character - My Wife

2007-10-02T12:12:00.000-07:00

10 A wife of noble character, who can find one? She is worth more than diamonds,

a corvette, or
all the gold in Fort Knox.
11 I have full confidence and trust in her, and as a result, lack nothing of value.
12 She is always good and not harmful, every day demonstrating love and care.
13 She chooses clothes to provide for her family with great, untiring eagerness, desiring for us
all to look our best. Washing and ironing never get her down.
14 She plans her shopping trips with great skill, seeking out every bargain, providing a
veritable jeep full of food and necessities, no matter how far she has to go to acquire them.
Her finding, filing, and use of coupons is unmatched and invaluable.
15 She gets up early in the morning, often while it’s still dark, to prepare for the days meals,
not only for the family, but for such guests as may be with us. Her Thanksgiving meals are
unexcelled.
16 She considers the best use and appearance of our property, combining the beauty of
gardens with the practicality of raspberries, cherries, apples, tomatoes, and the like.
17 She most often appears tireless in her approach to her responsibilities and pursues them
with great vigor.
18 She sees that her spending for provision is practical and efficient and plans for stock on
consumable items without flaw.
19 In her hands she adeptly handles the needle and thread, the crocheting needles, the
controls of the sewing machine, and the scissors to cut my hair.
20 She is exceedingly generous to those in need, sharing whatever, wherever and whenever
possible. She has a giving heart, easily discernable by all.
21 She has no fear of the family’s appearance, because she provides quality clothing as well as
household comforts.
22 She makes bed coverings, drapes, upholstering and all good material necessities for the
home.
23 Because of her good stature and excellent reputation, I have the respect of folks who are
my fellow co-workers, community citizens and church members.
24 She makes a variety of handmade gifts, frequently better than purchase-able items,
offsetting great cost to the family budget.
25 She carries herself with strength and dignity and generally looks to the future with
confidence.
26 She has great intuitive powers and can frequently view opportunities in difficult situations,
giving great recommendations and advice. Mentoring young women is her forte’.
27 She constantly cares for the affairs of the household and rarely wastes her time or energy.
Bible study and prayer start her day.
28 All of our family judges her to be an incredible Godly example of grace to us. There aren’t
enough opportunities to articulate all of her wonderful attributes, thought we would all hope
to.
29 The world or friends may hold up many women who do noble things, but none of them
surpass or even equal the accomplishments of my wife, my friend and the mother of our
children.
30 The world looks at charm and beauty, forgetting that much of that passes with time, but a
woman who fears the Lord and seeks His will and eternal benefit, far surpasses the
temporary qualities the world seeks after.
31 We all thank her for her tireless efforts and praise her for her Christ-like example of love
and sacrifice. Surely she is an example for all.

Righty-Tighty / Lefty-Loosey - Always Choices!

2007-09-28T11:53:00.000-07:00

Do you remember having been taught that there
was a correct and an incorrect way to tighten nuts and bolts,
water faucets, and door handles?

It was buried somewhere between "don't talk with your mouth full" and "sit up straight." Two personal experiences have brought those "sage" sayings to mind recently.

When my wife and I were vacationing in the UK we had to make the adjustment to several cultural things rather quickly. "Mind the gap!" was a frequently heard phrase any time we were near the tube (subway or train to we Americans.) Driving on the other side of the road is not only the practice (but encouraged for reasons of safety and order!) as was walking down the LEFT side of the stairs and through the LEFT side of double doors. Additionally, there was the ever-present phrase "please get in que," meaning don't butt in line, take your place at the rear of the folks already waiting for something-anything. Imagine our surprise on one occasion when we made it to the front of the line, only to realize we weren't interested in using the "lou."

Well, that seems to be mostly an "other-side-of-the-pond" issue, but we certainly have our own unique cultural things here as well. Except that we may have missed the opportunity to effectively pass on those rare tidbits.

While we know that talking out loud at a movie (as well as having a cell phone turned on) is frowned upon, we do it. Getting ahead of the other person is a common practice - just ask a New York cabbie - or the teen-agers at a Harry Potter premier. Just check out the folks when the "blue light special" is announced and an apparent fire-drill seems to have been created.

While we ceratinly don't want to be percieved as old fogies that are interested in rules, have you noticed the breakdown in the little tidbits of life that contribute to a well ordered culture? My favorite is watching with vast amusement the utter chaos that occurs at double doors on campus, when young folks try to go in and out of buildings at the same time, many opening the left doors! I don't think that they think they're in London.

However, many a dropped bookbag, spilled frappacino, and slightly grazed nose have resulted from this practice. Have they forgotten the righty-tighty / lefty-loosey advice they were given years ago, or did they think that ONLY applied to nuts and bolts? It's not about rules, but it IS about respect and courtesy!

Tomorrow (or today) try opening the RIGHT door and, as a courtesy, holding it for the person that is following you. They will greatly appreciate not having someone spill their frappacino!

Unless, of course, the other person on the other side of the door CHOSE THE LEFT SIDE!!

Hence The Name

2007-09-27T12:42:00.000-07:00

A Treatise on Wanting Things To Be Better for the Next Generation!

When I was very young, my mother used to have fried eggplant, with all the fixins' every Friday night and I always thought it was because that was her favorite meal. To this day I also like that meal, though it was well into my young adult life before I discovered that the reason for that Friday night special was because she used it as a meat substitute due to our family budget needs.
My father used to gather used newspapers and bundle them, planning to meet the big truck with the hanging scales which arrived once a month to gather the bundles, weigh them, and pass on to him an amount of cash equal to seventy-five cents per hundred pounds.

Those examples taught me a great deal about having to work hard, plan well, and "waste not" when it came to the things we wanted, perhaps even needed.
Recognizing that these are different times, shouldn't we still want some sort of fried eggplant and bundled newspapers in the life experiences of the next generation, whether they be our children, our students, our future political or business leaders?

Hopefully, this vehicle will allow me/us to discuss that which builds, praises, and challenges us to consider things that are true, honorable, right, pure, lovely, and admirable - all for the purpose of encouraging growth in character for those who follow us.